Friday, November 12, 2021

Turkey Trouble: A Silly Senryu

  

Sun tea is good. I'm not so sure about sun turkey.
Image by OpenClipart-Vectors from Pixabay

I must laugh out loud
recalling raw roast turkey
I know better now

~ornery owl~

notes
After yesterday's heavy load, I decided to go light-hearted. 2019 was the first year that I tried to roast a whole turkey. The slow-roasting procedure that I used did not work out marvelously and the turkey was still raw at the bone even after 18 hours in the oven. Since then, I have purchased an idiot-proof countertop roaster, which works beautifully.

If you'd like more information on the roaster I bought and why I like love it, read the following post.

prompts

Prompt: Laugh out loud

Prompt: Discuss something you have learned

Haiku My Heart

https://www.writersdigest.com/write-better-poetry/2021-november-pad-chapbook-challenge-day-12
Prompt: Write a "raw" poem

The Icky, Sticky, Nit-Picky Legalese If You Please (Or Don't Please)


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Sunday, November 7, 2021

Sunday Dinner at the Grover Hotel: The Culinary Misadventures of a Half-Assed Chef

  

Image by JL G from Pixabay

she took Billy Lynn's long walk to her kitchen
she resolved to prepare cuisine worthy of excitement
she committed herself to following the motivating recipe as closely as possible

her home smelled of rosy red petunias and pretty pickled peanuts
her appetite was insatiable
she took Billy Lynn's long walk to her kitchen

the dessert she made began with bent bristles and blended bananas 
she ignored the knitting neighbors and nagging noises
she resolved to prepare cuisine worthy of excitement

sometimes during past cooking adventures, she had improvised too much
now she realized the mistake she had made
she committed herself to following the motivating recipe as closely as possible

~ornery owl~

110 words

Note: This post originally appeared on my poetry blog.

prompts used to prepare this preposterous poem


Prompt: Write about food
The logo was designed by me using free elements from Pixlr. You are welcome to use it if you like. No credit is necessary.

Write a poem about a location.
In this poem, the location of focus is the kitchen.

Prompt: Write a poem about anticipation. Use the cascade form.

https://www.writersdigest.com/write-better-poetry/poetic-form-cascade-poem



This poem was inspired by a minor culinary disaster. Last night I made tapioca pudding in the slow cooker. My son took some upstairs to his room and came down a few minutes later to tell me the pudding had no flavor. Upon tasting it, I realized that I had forgotten to add sugar. I saved it for tonight and will blend it with some boxed vanilla pudding. 

Here is the recipe I used, in case you are interested. Don't forget the sugar!

4 cups milk

⅔ cup white sugar

½ cup small pearl tapioca

2 eggs, lightly beaten

Stir together the milk, sugar, tapioca, and eggs in a slow cooker. Cover, and cook on medium for 3 hours, or on Low for 6 hours, stirring occasionally. Serve warm.

I also added 1/4 cup of butter for flavor, but that is optional. I had a bit of leftover rice from dinner which I threw in as well.

I didn't have any small pearl tapioca, so I used the large pearl variety. Small pearl tapioca does not have to be soaked. Large pearl does. Oddly enough, tapioca is hard to come by in my area. I haven't had much luck finding it online either.

Here is the recipe source.


The Icky, Sticky, Nit-Picky Legalese If You Please (Or Don't Please)


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Saturday, October 23, 2021

Helloween 2021 Day 23: My Unbelievable House

  



most find it unbelievable

that I am haunting a big house

filled with so much history

they always anticipated

that I would end up living on the street

 

I am still trying to create

order from the mess that is my life

it seems that each time I mend something

another thing breaks

 

I can trace this house's past

through the residents of the town

it was built in 1910

it is on the historical register

 

it started life as a hotel

it was once a house of ill repute

it has been a hospital and a church

a boarding house for teachers

and a bed and breakfast

 

the house was populated by idiots

at certain points in its existence

one selfish woman and her bratty children

destroyed beautiful artwork

created by the teachers who once lived here

 

there are similarities and differences

between the self-absorbed floozy

and the fix-and-flipper

she lived for her whims

he had tunnel vision

 

I find myself unsure

If I am making forward movement

I don’t have adequate money

To make more repairs

 

I find myself staring down the barrel

Of going back to work

I am still compromised

I could only work part-time

 

Disability doesn’t pay enough

And I’m tired of dealing with their guff

You can only amass $2000 in savings

You can only have one car

 

Never mind if you think it would be wise to have a backup vehicle

Or want to put aside some money

In case of emergencies

 

Or that $1380 per month

Only just pays the bills

And then they take back $140 of that

To pay the Medicare premiums

 

I would like to haunt my bruised old house on the prairie

Every day forever

I don’t want to return to my old job

Two hours away from home

 

Where I’ll have to get a hotel room

And be away from home three days a week

I just want to haunt my unbelievable home

I just want to be free at last

 

To be what I am

And not what everyone else

Thinks that I should be

But have failed to be

 

I want to be the real me

But I’m not entirely sure

What that is

 

369 words

~Ornery Owl Has Spoken~


Free-use image from Open Clipart Vectors

los promptos

Prompt: Unbelievable




I used the word prompts for day 22 and didn't follow the prompt for day 23.



The Icky, Sticky, Nit-Picky Legalese If You Please (Or Don't Please)


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Sunday, September 26, 2021

Sunday Dinner at the Grover Hotel: The Easiest and Best Alfredo Sauce

 

Image by pixel1 from Pixabay

The next time you are in the grocery store and you say to yourself:

"I think I'll pick up a jar of alfredo sauce..."

Just imagine a fat owl in a chef's hat barreling down on you in a flying tackle, hooting:

"Stop, you fool!"

Why?

Because if you buy the stuff in the jar, you'll be missing out on the best alfredo sauce you've ever tasted. It's the alfredo sauce that you'll be making yourself. It isn't the least bit difficult and it only has four ingredients. The recipe is easy to multiply to suit your needs.

You will need a saucepan, a whisk, and a spoon for tasting.

Melt 1/4 cup of butter on medium heat. 

Once the butter has melted, pour in 1 pint of heavy cream. You can use half and half or milk if you don't have heavy cream, but heavy cream yields the thickest sauce with the best taste.

Mix in either a crushed garlic clove or 1/2 teaspoon of garlic powder. You might try crushed roasted garlic cloves. So might I at some point in the future.

Stir in 3/4 cup of shredded Parmesan cheese. It's best to get the higher quality stuff from the deli section rather than the stuff in the jar, which has anti-caking agents added. Shredded Parmesan cheese can be kept in the freezer. I didn't have anything but the stuff in the jar when I made this recipe. It wasn't a deal-breaker, but the anti-caking agent adds a slight aftertaste.

Stir the sauce frequently with a whisk until it has thickened and is just starting to bubble. Do not allow it to boil.

Pour over pasta and enjoy!

I found this delicious copycat Olive Garden alfredo sauce on the CopyKat Recipes site. https://copykat.com/olive-garden-alfredo-sauce/

You can purchase garlic powder from the grocery store, from my Watkins affiliate page, or from Amazon. 




At the time of this writing, this handsome Carote 2-quart nonstick saucepan is on sale for $13.99 (normally $29.99). I think I may just need one for myself.


This handy set of silicone-coated kitchen tools is currently $19.99


This two-piece set of silicone cooking spoons is currently $10.99

I hope that you enjoy this decadent alfredo sauce as much as I do. It's easy to make, especially when you have the right tools, and tastes so much better than the stuff from a jar. 

Happy Cooking!


Ornery Owl
Free-use image from Open Clipart Vectors

Come cook with Ornery Owl on the official Good Stuff from Grover blog


Don't forget to enter the monthly drawing to Win Free Vanilla plus approximately $100 worth of great spices and extracts from Watkins. Contest open to residents of the U.S. and Canada. No purchase is necessary and you will not be contacted without your permission.



The Icky, Sticky, Nit-Picky Legalese If You Please (Or Don't Please)



Creative Commons License

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This work is the intellectual property of Naughty Netherworld Press.

Reblogging is acceptable on platforms that allow it. Odysee’s reblog function is called repost, which makes things confusing since reposting is considered a no-no on most platforms. It’s fine to share the post using the repost function on Odysee. It is not okay to copy-paste the material into a new post.

Sharing a link to the post is acceptable.

Quoting portions of the post for educational or review purposes is acceptable if proper credit is given.










Sunday, August 1, 2021

Sunday Dinner at the Grover Hotel: Slow Cooker Eye Round Roast

 


Get the Instant Pot delivered to your door with Amazon.
https://amzn.to/3bOGxOC (Currently $89)

Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase through one of the links in this post, I will earn a small commission.

I'm rather sad that it's been two months since I did a Sunday Dinner post. But rather than lamenting and berating myself (something that I excel at) let's dive right into the deliciousness.

On my recent foray to Friendly Nick's butcher in Fort Collins (http://fnbutcher.com) I picked up a gorgeous eye round roast. The eye round is an inexpensive, fairly lean cut of meat, so it can be tough if not cooked properly. If possible, I recommend getting meat from an independent butcher. I've found that it doesn't cost any more than purchasing the meat in a grocery store, and the quality is far superior. 

I fired up the saute function on the Instant Pot, put in a little canola oil, let it heat up, and browned the outside of the roast. I then sprinkled the roast with my favorite spice mix, The Blend from Kinder's. This mix has just three ingredients: black pepper, sea salt, and garlic powder. You could certainly make your own. 

I like to stock up on Kinder's from Costco when it's on sale because it's very inexpensive. You can also purchase two 10.5-ounce bottles from Amazon, currently priced at $18.94. https://amzn.to/3fjz37M

I poured a bit of chicken stock into the bottom of the pot, closed the lid, and fired up the slow cooker function. I've mentioned previously how much I love using my Instant Pot as a slow cooker. It cooks the food more evenly, and the outside of the pot stays cool, which makes me feel safer if I want to leave it unattended while I go out for a while.

I get the best price on chicken stock at Costco. Do NOT buy Kirkland chicken stock from Amazon or you'll pay about three times what you would in the store. If you want to buy chicken stock from Amazon, the Kitchen Basics brand is comparable to grocery store price at $3.24 for 32 ounces. https://amzn.to/3loe2wH

About three hours into cooking, I remembered that I wanted to find a copycat recipe for Arby's beef. My son and I love the Beef and Cheddar sandwiches, but you really don't get enough beef bang for your buck. Lo and behold, I found a recipe at Secret Copycat Restaurant Recipes. I'll give you the full recipe below and then tell you the modifications I made.

Materials
1 3 to 4-pound Roast Beef
1/2 cup Water
1/2 cup firmly packed Brown Sugar
1 envelope Onion Soup Mix
1 Onion
1/2 teaspoon Garlic Powder
Salt and freshly ground Black Pepper
8 Onion Hamburger Buns

Instructions
1. Place roast in crockpot.
2. Stir remaining ingredients (except the buns, of course) together and pour over roast.
3. Cook for 8 - 10 hours on low, stirring occasionally.
4. Pull apart or slice thin.
5. Serve on buns.

Notes
Makes about 8 sandwiches

The roast was halfway through cook time at the point when I added the brown sugar and onion soup mix. I didn't add any fresh onion. My excuse is feeling a bit knackered after having my second COVID shot Friday. 

My son felt worse than I did. All his muscles were sore, he was a bit nauseous, and he was fatigued. I was slightly more fatigued than usual and I had to use my asthma inhaler for the first time in months. We're back to abnormal today.

The upshot is the roast didn't taste quite like Arby's, but it was really good. Next time I'll try it using the above instructions from the start and see what happens.

You can get 16 two-ounce envelopes of Lipton's Onion Soup Mix from Amazon for $19.83. That works out to $1.23 per envelope. https://amzn.to/3xci51z

I hope you beef lovers try this recipe and let me know what you think.

Happy Cooking!


Ornery Owl
Free-use image from Open Clipart Vectors

Come cook with Ornery Owl on the official Good Stuff from Grover blog


Don't forget to enter the monthly drawing to Win Free Vanilla plus approximately $100 worth of great spices and extracts from Watkins. Contest open to residents of the U.S. and Canada. No purchase is necessary and you will not be contacted without your permission.



The Icky, Sticky, Nit-Picky Legalese If You Please (Or Don't Please)



Creative Commons License

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.

This work is the intellectual property of Naughty Netherworld Press.

Reblogging is acceptable on platforms that allow it. Odysee’s reblog function is called repost, which makes things confusing since reposting is considered a no-no on most platforms. It’s fine to share the post using the repost function on LBRY. It is not okay to copy-paste the material into a new post.

Sharing a link to the post is acceptable.

Quoting portions of the post for educational or review purposes is acceptable if proper credit is given.

Sunday, May 23, 2021

Sunday Dinner at the Grover Hotel: Make Your Life Easier With an Oster Roaster Oven and Instant Pot

 


One of the items I purchased when my disability came through with back payments was this excellent Oster roaster oven. It's a bargain at $79.99. Click the link below to see all the wonderful, time-saving features.


I will never roast meat in my regular oven again. In November of last year, the food bank gave my son and me an 18-pound turkey and our housemate an 18-pound turkey. One of those turkeys was cooked in the regular oven and the other was cooked in the Oster roaster oven.

The first turkey was a huge hassle to deal with. I had to thaw it in the refrigerator for five days beforehand. When I roasted it in the regular oven, it didn't cook evenly and it didn't taste very good. 

The turkey cooked in the Oster roaster oven was perfect! I didn't have the hassle of defrosting it in the fridge thanks to the roaster oven's defrosting feature. The roaster oven comes with a handy guide for defrosting meat.

I used a roasting bag for the turkey but have since discovered that it's easier to just line the roaster and tent the meat with Reynold's wrap. I will provide links below for both roaster bags and Reynold's wrap in case you do prefer to use roaster bags.


https://amzn.to/2RycTX6

The link I'm providing is not for the brand of roaster bags that I used. This looks like a much better product. The bags I used didn't fit over the roaster pan, they required that the turkey be stuffed inside and were a real hassle. I'm going to try these myself.



If you have a Costco membership, this is the most cost-effective way to buy Reynold's Wrap. My son and I bought a food-service package of Reynold's Wrap last year and there's still plenty left. The product pictured above runs $16.99 for two 175-foot rolls, which is a pretty good deal.

I normally buy meat from Friendly Nick's Butcher (http://fnbutcher.com) in Fort Collins because they get their meat from independent Colorado farms dedicated to the humane treatment of their livestock. This results in better-tasting, healthier meat. However, when the food bank gave us a whole rack of Kirkland brand pork, that was an offer I couldn't refuse.

When cooked in the Oster roaster oven, the pork turned out just right. I cut it into eight chops. We had the first two chops for dinner right away and I used the rest in recipes over the week. 



Since I'm only cooking for my son and me, I usually use the slow cooker feature on my Instant Pot. My old slow cooker has been retired. I never felt quite confident about leaving it on the countertop because the outside always got hot. 

The outside of the Instant Pot stays cool, and I feel confident about leaving it to cook even if I'm going out for a while. It automatically switches to the Keep Warm setting if I'm busy when the cooking time ends.

The food cooks more evenly with the slow cooker function on the Instant Pot than it did in my old crockpot. I even bought a second instant pot so I could cook two things at once. 

If you're cooking stew or soup for a big crowd, you might want to use the Oster Roaster Oven rather than the Instant Pot. I'd definitely suggest using the liners made for the roaster oven. Never use a liner in the Instant Pot.

I hope you'll consider giving the Oster Roaster Oven and Instant Pot a try. I think you'll find that they simplify your life and will help keep your kitchen cool in the summer since you'll be able to avoid turning on the stove for prolonged periods to roast meat or make stew or soup.

Happy cooking!


Ornery Owl
Free use image by Open Clipart Vectors



"I like cooking with wine. Sometimes I even put it in the food that I'm cooking."
--Ornery Owl
Julia Child

Come cook with Ornery Owl on the official Good Stuff from Grover blog

https://bit.ly/GoodGrover

Or on Ornery’s Odysee channel.

https://bit.ly/ornerycooking


Be sure to visit the above link and enter to win free Watkins baking vanilla plus approximately $100 worth of other good things from Watkins. No purchase is necessary to win.


The Icky, Sticky, Nit-Picky Legalese If You Please (Or Don't Please)



Creative Commons License

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.

This work is the intellectual property of Naughty Netherworld Press.

Reblogging is acceptable on platforms that allow it. Odysee’s reblog function is called repost, which makes things confusing since reposting is considered a no-no on most platforms. It’s fine to share the post using the repost function on LBRY. It is not okay to copy-paste the material into a new post.

Sharing a link to the post is acceptable.

Quoting portions of the post for educational or review purposes is acceptable if proper credit is given.

Saturday, April 17, 2021

Same Old Sob Story: Lone Prairie Version

  



I'm here to tell you a story
that you already know so well
six-time loser down on her luck
at least this afternoon
we'll be able to hit the food bank

pushed out of the city
because we couldn't afford to stay
the poor are not welcome
on the streets of concrete and asphalt
we didn't want to stay anyway

the moon on the prairie is pretty
the sky is big and on a summer day
the clouds look like ice cream floats
I like it better out here
but old habits and conditions die hard

I am still nowhere even close to having wealth
while I love my affordable crockery
that I purchased during those fleeting moments when I had the means
I wish that I could know security
one of the things that money can buy

I think I'll change the words of the song
to "make good with you"
or maybe "make good on what we do"
since I'm talking about family
specifically, my son

and having a successful life
here on the prairie
and nothing of romance
or any of that sort of nonsense
that I sure as hell don't need 

my own life is enough of a shambles
I don't need an overbearing father
or a spoiled little boy
in an overripe body
thinking that testosterone makes him the boss

I don't speak to much of anybody
I don't allow myself to think much on
things that are going to make me cry
but many days I feel as if my heart might pop
here inside my lonely bubble

I'm trying to get back into my routine
after a week of feeling attacked from many angles
I don't respond well to adversity
I guess the collection agency decided to leave me be
you can't get blood from a stone as they say

I'm still waiting on the delivery of my freezer

~cie~



Day 15: Write a (Blank) Story poem.

Day 16:
Write a City poem.

Day 17: 
Write a Waiting poem.






Day 15: Write a poem about a habit you picked up from your parents.

Day 16: Write a Skeletonic verse.
I didn't do this.

Day 17: Write a poem about the moon.



speak
cry
stop
allow
pop


https://pensitivity101.wordpress.com/2021/04/17/three-things-challenge-571/

WEALTH
AFFORDABLE
CROCKERY

The Icky, Sticky, Nit-Picky Legalese If You Please (Or Don't Please)


Creative Commons License


This work is the intellectual property of Naughty Netherworld Press/Poetry of the Netherworld.

Reblogging is acceptable on platforms that allow it. Odysee’s reblog function is called repost, which makes things confusing since reposting is considered a no-no on most platforms. It’s fine to share the post using the repost function on Odysee. It is not okay to copy-paste the material into a new post.

Sharing a link to the post is acceptable.

Quoting portions of the post for educational or review purposes is acceptable if proper credit is given.

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Most of it is better than this, I promise.

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